When using an inversion table

My first morning at the gym in a really long time. Truth be told, it’s been a much longer time than you or anyone else could ever imagine…I am actually coming out of a ten year gym hibernation period. At least, I think it is ten….it could actually be eleven or twelve really. Sigh.

A lot has changed here with all the new and random items of exercise equipment. Some things that are here look like alien inventions and I wonder what on Earth they do for you besides making you want to hold your top down to ensure it doesn’t come up (or down, as it were) when using an inversion table (Yes, I know. I had no clue what it was either until I asked an instructor and apparently, you hang upside down on it. Something to do with bad backs. Don’t ask).

The amount of really losers I see at the gym is another thing I instantly notice. They all stand in their rows while doing weights, completely checking themselves out in the mirror while they do! Are they that into themselves that they need to look at themselves while they pump weights? Really? You guys really look like tossers in all honesty!

Hardly approachable so I doubt you’ll pick up any ladies that way (dear God, I hope that is not what your intention is in those horrendous shorts that make you look like a try hard AFL football player!).

Oh dear, I now remember all the reasons I hated coming here…I might just head home again.

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